Brown was very proud of his young son. Once he was talking to a visitor, telling the man how clever his son was.

"The boy is only two years old," he said, "and knows all animals. He's going to be a great naturalist. Here, let me show you."

He took a book of natural history from the bookshelf, placed Bobby on his knee, opened the book and showed him a picture of a giraffe.

"What's that, Bobby?" "

Horsey, " said Bobby. Next of a tiger was shown, and Bobby said, "Pussy." Then Brown showed Bobby a picture of lion, and Bobby said, "Doggy." And when a picture of a chimpanzee was shown, Bobby said, "Daddy!"

布朗非常欣赏他的小儿子。一次他和一位客人聊他的儿子有多聪明。 布朗说：“他只有两岁，就认识所有的动物了。他长大一定会是一个出色的自然学家。来，我让你看看。”

他从书架上拿下一本自然书，把博比抱到膝上，打开书。指着一张长颈鹿的画片。

“博比，这是什么？” “马马，”博比回答。 他又指了一张老虎的画片，博比回答说：“猫咪。” 然后布朗又指了一张狮子的画片，博比说：“狗狗。” 他又指了一张黑猩猩的画片，博比说：“爸爸！” [注]horsey: 马（儿语） pussy：猫咪（儿语）

Little Mary: I find in my history book there is always such number (1451-1560) after the name Christopher Columbus. Would you please explain why, sir?

Little Rose: I can tell her, sir. It was Columbus' telephone number!

小玛丽：我在历史书中发现，克里斯托弗·哥伦布这个名字后面老是有(1451-1560)这几个数字。老师，请您给解释一下好吗？

小罗斯：老师，我能告诉她。那是哥伦布的电话号码！

Correct 很对

Teacher: Jimmy, what are the three words which pupils use most often at school?

Jimmy: I don't know.

Teacher: Correct.

教师：吉米，学生在学校里经常用的三个字是什么？

吉米：不知道……

教师：很对。

I thought my wife, Barbara, was losing her hearing, so one day I decided to test it. I quietly walked in the front door and stood 30 feet behind her, "Barbara," I said, "can you hear me?" There was no response, so I moved to 20 feet behind her behind her, "Barbara," I repeated, "can you hear me ?" Still no reply. I advanced to 10 feet and asked, "Now can you hear me?" "Yes, dear," Barbara answered. "For the third time, yes!"

我以为我的妻子芭芭拉耳聋了。有一天，我想证明一下，我轻轻走进前门，站在她后面三十英尺的地方，“芭芭拉，”我说，“你听得见我吗？”她没有回答。所以我又走过去一些，站在她后面二十英尺的地方，“芭芭拉，”我重复道，“你听得见我吗？”还是没有回答。我又往前到了只有十英尺的地方，我问：“现在听得见吗？”“是的，亲爱的，”芭芭拉说，“我已经说了第三遍了。”

Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head and whispered," To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago."

Bernie应邀来到他的朋友Morris家吃晚餐。在朋友家，Bernie发现，不管问他老婆什么问题，Morris总要在每句话的前面加上一些亲密的称呼，象蜜糖，我的爱人，亲爱的，甜心等等。Bernie对Morris说，“你们夫妻俩真够亲密的，结婚这么多年了，你还叫她叫得那么亲密。”Morris低下头，小声地对Bernie说，“老实跟你说吧，三年前我忘记老婆的真名是什么了。”

Teacher had set his class an essay "A Game of Cricket". After two minutes Simon Stee handed his paper in and was allowed to go home. His essay read: "Rain stopped play"..

老师给学生出了作文题：“一场板球赛”。两分钟后，西蒙·斯蒂尔交了作文，老师允许他回家了，他在作文上写道：“下雨，比赛中止。”

In the traffic court of a large mid-western city, a young lady was brought before the judge to answer a ticket given her for driving through a red light. She explained to his honor that she was a school teacher and requested an immediate disposal of her case in order that she might hasten on to her classes. A wild gleam came into the judge's eye. "You are a school teacher, eh?" said he. "Madam, I shall realize my lifelong ambition. Sit down at that table and write 'I went through a red light' five hundred times."
在中西部一个大城市的交通法庭里，一位年轻女士被带到法官面前，她由于开车闯红灯被开了罚单。女士向法官解释，她是一名学校老师，请求法官马上处理她的案子，以便可以赶回去上课。法官眼中闪过一丝狡黠，说道：“你是学校的老师，对吗？女士，我马上要实现我毕生的愿望了。在那张桌子旁坐下，写‘我开车闯了红灯’500遍。”

A doctor and a lawyer were talking at a party. Their conversation was constantly interrupted by people describing their ailments and asking the doctor for free medical advice. After an hour of this, the exasperated doctor asked the lawyer, "What do you do to stop people from asking you for legal advice when you're out of the office?"


"I give it to them," replied the lawyer, "and then I send them a bill." The doctor was shocked, but agreed to give it a try. The next day, still feeling slightly guilty, the doctor prepared the bills. When he went to place them in his mailbox, he found a bill from the lawyer.


医生和律师正在一个宴会上交谈。他们的谈话常被一些人打断，那些人向医生描述自己的病症，期望获得免费的治疗建议。如此这般一个钟头后，医生有点恼火，于是他问律师：“如果不在办公时间，你是怎么阻止人们向你咨询法律问题的？”


“我会给他们建议，”律师回答，“然后我会给他们寄去帐单”。医生很震惊，但他还是决定这么试一试。第二天，带着点犯罪感，他准备了帐单。当他准备将它们放到邮箱里时，发现了一张来自律师的帐单。

Not long after an old Chinese woman came back to China from her visit to her daughter in the States, she went to a city bank to deposit the US dollars her daughter gave her. At the bank counter, the clerk checked each note carefully to see if the money was real. It made the old lady out of patience. At last she could not hold any more, uttering. "Trust me, Sir, and trust the money. They are real US dollars. They are directly from America."

一位中国老太太去美国看望女儿回来不久，到一家市银行存女儿给她的美元。在银行柜台，银行职员认真检查了每一张钞票，看是否有假。 这种做法让老妇人很不耐烦，最后她实在忍不住说：“相信我，先生，也请你相信这些钞票。这些都是真正的美元，它们都是直接从美国带来的。”

Son: Dad, give me a dime.

Father: Son, don't you think you're getting too big to be forever begging for dimes?

Son: I guess you're right, Dad. Give me a dollar, will you?

儿子：爸爸，给我一角钱。

父亲：儿子，你不认为你已经长大了，不该再老是一角一角地要钱了(该自立了)，不是吗？

儿子：爸爸，我想你是对的，那给我一块钱行吗？